A word about E...

While we were planning this second adoption trip, some of the people I told that we were bringing our 3 year old along for the ride gave us some very strange looks.  Would she help or hinder...did we really want to take an impatient kid on a very long flight...wouldn't it be harder to tote two of them around the crazy streets of China.  But, not for a minute did we consider leaving E home.  First off, she *is* our connection to China (well, *was*) and we wanted her to experience it again.  She's a great traveler, I couldn't bear the thought of leaving my bestie for almost 2 weeks, and it seemed like it would be extremely hard on her for us to be gone and then come home with a shiny new baby.

There's no doubt that this trip to China is about R.  E already had her near-two weeks of misery all to herself.  But E has been an integral, irreplaceable part of this trip, too.

At times when things have been hard, E has made us laugh with her little "E-isms."  Even though she's been somewhat rejected by her little sister, she tries and tries and tries to be kind to her.  When we meet someone new, E proudly exclaims, "Dat Roe-rie!  She my little sister!  I'm big sister!"

After the potty debacle when I tried to put R on the potty, we made E go on the potty in front of R to show her it was OK and wouldn't swallow her whole.  "Look at me!  I love the potty!  I looooove going poo-poo!" she screamed, unscripted.

E tries and tries again to give things to R, share things with her, feed her, and generally be sweet to her.  When E gets swatted away, she'll just look at me innocently and say, "I don't think Roe-rie want that right now."

During our first adoption trip, during times of heavy grieving, we couldn't leave the hotel room, couldn't stop to eat, couldn't do anything fun.  But that was OK...we were the adults and we signed on for that.  This time, we've had a few very hard moments like that.  One night, we promised E we would go out to a "big restaurant", but dinner became ramen and Cheeze-its in our room when R was screaming uncontrollably.  E's first try at the pool was postponed because R was too miserable to leave the room.  That's a lot to ask of a 3 year old, but E has taken it mostly in stride, saying, "Why she sad?  Why Roe-rie cry again?"  I am always proud of my first daughter, but now more than ever.

To say that E hasn't had her moments, too, wouldn't be fair.  It's really hard for her to see her BFF (me) trying to show affection and bond with R.  She's thrown herself on the floor in a fit that looks like she's in actual pain more than once when I've picked R up.  Consequently, I've done a lot of picking up, holding, feeding, cuddling, and loving on E, too.  If she needs that from me now, that's OK.  She's my baby, too, and I'd do anything to make it easier for her.

So, if I had to do it again, I'd definitely bring E with us.  Seeing her in the place where she came from, and having her be a part of the growth of our family has been very important for all of us, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

The ever-excited E, with little sister looking on.