Everyone seems to be very excited for me, this being my first Mother's Day ever. But, to me, today is more about the brave little girl who made me a mother and three very special women than it is about me. Without my mother, Nana with the Red Hair, and Nana with the Piano, I would not know how to be a mother. Without my E, I would not be experiencing this amazing journey that is motherhood.
In the very short time I have been a mother, I have learned that motherhood is an experiment. There is no way to do it except to learn as you go. It is a neverending cycle of failure and trying something new until you make things work. You build on what you know, emulating the mothers whom you repect, and avoiding the pitfalls of those you don't. Sometimes you will go to bed at night and feel as if you did everything wrong no matter how hard you tried. But the key is that you tried.
Today isn't about a Hallmark card or flowers or brunch. It is about finally understanding a mother's love. It is about a love so great that it hurts sometimes. It is about saying thank you to my own mother for everything that she has done and continues to do for me. It is about remembering my grandmothers, and hoping that they are proud of me, and the mother I have become. It is about my daughter, and knowing that while I may make a lot of mistakes, that I love her more than I ever knew was possible and that I always try to be the best mother I can be.
I am proud to follow in some pretty big footsteps. My mom in sneakers as she powerwalks by my house every day. Nana with the Piano in her little slippers shuffling around the Cape house. Nana with the Red Hair in heels...even her slippers had little heels. I am so fortunate to have all of you as role models. I love you, Happy Mother's Day!