Sunday, February 5, 2012

X's and O's

I have never asked or told E to hug or kiss me.  I figured that in her own time, she'd decide when she wanted to plant one on me, and when she did it, it would be because she wanted to, not because she was directed to.  I figured I would be sitting on a beach somewhere on Cape Cod in late July before it happened.

Then it did.

Out of nowhere.

We weren't having one of our cuddle sessions, we weren't kissing her favorite baby doll, we weren't even playing at all. 

We were getting ready to go to Home Depot.

I sat on the bottom step of our stairs, getting ready to put my shoes on.  E came over, carrying my Uggs.  I started to put them on, and she started tugging on them to help me.  Then all of a sudden, out of the blue, there it was...a kiss!  So faint, so tiny, I actually didn't know what it was.  I thought, "It couldn't's much too soon," and went on with my other boot.

Then it happened again.

And again!

I tried to act all casual, as if the world hadn't stopped turning on it's axis, but inside, my heart was racing like it never has (sorry, P).

I looked into her huge eyes, and she had an ear-to-ear, yet somewhat shy grin on her face.  And she kissed me again.  This wasn't a kiss on a boo boo, it was just a kiss, well, just because.  A kiss that she wanted to give me, for whatever reason.

We have only known E for under a month.  I am astounded, amazed, SHOCKED at the transformation that this incredible little girl has undergone.  She has changed from a scared, sad, inconsolable girl to a loving, smiling, happy one.  I am also amazed at the transformation that this family has undergone in the past month.  We can't even imagine our life before E was in it.  She has brought us such joy in the short time we have known her, in both the hard times and the carefree ones.

And when I think back to those very dark and trying days in China, I would have never in my wildest dreams imagined that she would kiss me on her own, less than a month after Gotcha Day.

Every day E reminds me that I am the luckiest woman in the world.  They say "a kiss is just a kiss."  Not when it comes from your daughter.


Anonymous said...

this brings tears to my eyes-- how wonderful for you and her she is your daughter and wanted to show you how she loves you-- so sweet so very happy for you we are all so blessde to be moms and dads to these precious little ones-- Cathy in Illinois mom to beautiful Caitlin who will be 16 on the 22nd

Anonymous said...

So happy for you!! This post made me smile! Blessings, Cindy

Bonnie, Jim and Ainsley said...

Wow!!! I loved your post. It brought me to tears. So happy for you and your family :)

Lily said...

So glad to see your family back all well and smiling, so happy for you !!!
Let me know when you are ready for a playdate :)

Anna said...

Literally tears in my eyes after reading this. So happy for your guys.

Anonymous said...

oh, this is so sweet! wish Daddy will get the same treats very soon! lol

Anonymous said...

OH that is so sweet-it isn't taking much for me to cry today...what a wonderous event....-Vea (RQ)

Shawn said...

I am so happy for you to get that wonderful first kiss from your daughter so much sooner that you imagined! I've been following your story since it was posted on No Hands But Ours and praying for little E. We are still in the paperwork process for adopting from China, and like you, don't have any other kids. So ahppy for your family!

The Jiu Jiu said...

All I can say is... FANTASTIC! You've been loving E as hard as you can from the first moment, and this shows that she knows it. :-)

Lillie Family said...

Oh deal lord, tears.